Right after this unpleasant chat, we flash back to those good ole' days in Deutschland, where Poussey is having a smoke. A knock on the door breaks the silence and after she quickly tries to hide evidence of the cigarette, her father enters with a grim look on his face. He sits down on her bed and breaks the news, "We're being transferred back to the States. I don't know why, but we are. Sorry. I let you both down, P." Aw, Mr. Washington! He looks so sad and confused! Knowing the reason behind it all, Poussey sits heartbroken on her bed. Well, this is the opposite of a feel-good scene.
Honey, is there a reason you look like the female version of Mr. T?
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I pity the fool who dare insult my look!
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Flashing forward, Piper is walking outside on another electrical assignment, when Officer Maxwell pops out for a smoke. When she sees Piper, she warns, "You're out of bounds, Chapman," but Piper knows she's safe, replying, "Well, I won't tell if you don't." When Maxwell agrees to this, Piper takes the opportunity to ask her a question in her ongoing investigation: "Hey, you know, I heard that there were plans to build a gym here. Do you know whatever happened to that?" Cynically, Maxwell: "What always happens." Then the deep voice of Healy comes out of nowhere, telling Maxwell, "I'll take it from here." Oooh, buddy. Maxwell flicks her cigarette and bolts, as Healy approaches Piper: "Why are you asking Maxwell about a gym? From what I hear, you're full of questions lately."
With a smile on her face, Piper explains, "You know that I have always been interested in the health and safety of others." She then looks him directly in the eye, daring him to challenge her. Young lady, you better watch yourself! Healy tells her, "I'm trying to help you with your nana. So again, why are you asking all these questions?" After a longer than comfortable silence, Piper gains the courage to state, "Freedom of the press shouldn't only be a privilege of the free." His face contorting in confusion, Healy fires back, "What the fuck does that mean? What does the press have anything to do with this?" Fair questions. Searching for a way out of this, Piper blurts out, "I'm starting a prison newsletter." Oh, are we now? "A newsletter...written by the prisoners...with
With a smile on her face, Piper explains, "You know that I have always been interested in the health and safety of others." She then looks him directly in the eye, daring him to challenge her. Young lady, you better watch yourself! Healy tells her, "I'm trying to help you with your nana. So again, why are you asking all these questions?" After a longer than comfortable silence, Piper gains the courage to state, "Freedom of the press shouldn't only be a privilege of the free." His face contorting in confusion, Healy fires back, "What the fuck does that mean? What does the press have anything to do with this?" Fair questions. Searching for a way out of this, Piper blurts out, "I'm starting a prison newsletter." Oh, are we now? "A newsletter...written by the prisoners...with
Oooooh, girl, I heard all about how Vause burned you in Chi-town
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articles and op-ed pieces. That is why I've been trying to get out of my bubble and get to know this place. We...this...this is our home. We should all be communicating more. Inmates, guards, administration. This could really, really help us get to know each other and this place better." Wow, Piper, quite a Newsies-esque idea to pull out of your ass.
After realizing she needs to coerce Healy onto her side, she adds, "Pending your approval...Mr....Editor-in-Chief?" Seeing right through her, Healy cautions, "Don't oversell it." Taking a moment to contemplate the possible benefits of this idea for himself, he eventually concedes, "Okay. I'm not saying yes. Show me some sample stories by tomorrow." Then, in a telling statement, he says, "The girls used to like me." Piper assures, "They will again." We'll see about that. Over in the janitorial supplies room, Vee enters and notices that her new girls - Taystee and Watson - are not pleased with their reassignments. When Watson storms off, Taystee lays it out there: "I don't understand what you doing." Vee tries to address her doubts, but across the room, Suzanne has discovered some very interesting trash: the wedding invitation for Lorna's "ex-boyfriend," Christopha. Oh, my my my. Wait, does Suzanne even know that the "Christopher" in the invite |
is the same that Lorna claims is her fiancé? Unclear at the moment.
Meanwhile, Taystee continues to air her grievances with Vee: "You don't have a plan! You just wanna prove that you can order me around, but naw, not anymore." Vee directs Taystee to open a box sitting next to them. When Taystee hesitates, Vee commands more forcefully, "Open the box." She does so warily, but only finds more cleaning supplies inside. She continues her tirade, but Vee grabs her hand and opens up the cleaner cannister, only to have tobacco pour out of it. Vee smiles as Taystee realizes what she has has been planning all along. That lady always seems to find a way to profit on the pain of others. If she had
Meanwhile, Taystee continues to air her grievances with Vee: "You don't have a plan! You just wanna prove that you can order me around, but naw, not anymore." Vee directs Taystee to open a box sitting next to them. When Taystee hesitates, Vee commands more forcefully, "Open the box." She does so warily, but only finds more cleaning supplies inside. She continues her tirade, but Vee grabs her hand and opens up the cleaner cannister, only to have tobacco pour out of it. Vee smiles as Taystee realizes what she has has been planning all along. That lady always seems to find a way to profit on the pain of others. If she had
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a Twitter account, I would not follow it. Yeah, I'm that serious.
Out in the hallway, Piper is sifting through her mail, when she comes across a large red envelope with familiar handwriting on it and a return address of "AV" with a heart symbol. *GASP! Amerigo Vespucci has resurrected from the dead and sent Piper a valentine! Or...more likely, it is the MIA badass, Alex Vause! Alex, we miss you! Well, maybe not Piper. Her face hardens upon the sight of the card and immediately shoves it into a nearby trash can. Oh no! At least open it and make sure there's no money in it! Or nude-y Judys! Le sigh. I miss my Vauseman. In the library, Poussey is sitting at a desk, reading a book, when Taystee sneaks up from behind and playfully wraps her hands around Poussey's neck and head. Kinda cozy, if you ask me. With an ornery grin on her face, she leans down in front of Poussey and tells her, "Close your eyes." Reluctantly, Poussey does so, and Taystee adds, "Open your lips." Uh...where is this going? Smiling, Poussey lets her lips part and leans in expectantly, when Taystee slips...a cigarette in her mouth. NOT COOL, TAYSTEE, NOT COOL! You know she likes |
Postage due? That bitch didn't even pay for stamps!
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you! You can't do that to her! Oblivious, Taystee boasts about Vee's idea of turning a profit inside LCF, but Poussey just stares at the cigarette with disappointment. Aw, man, that sucked.
And flashback! Poussey is standing by the window as Franziska pleads in the background, "Tell your father to fight!" In a defeated tone, Poussey responds, "Won't help. Your father wants us gone, we're gone." Franziska resolves, "Then I'm coming with you." Poussey, laughing: "Don't think Jersey's for you." Franziska: "I love you, Poussey." Turning to face her, Poussey says, "Look, you're fun to fuck, but that's it." She can't even get that sentence out without her voice breaking. When Franziska continues to profess her love for Poussey, she only responds, "You have killer tits. I'll remember those." Oh Poussey, don't do this! In a last ditch attempt to get through to her, Franziska asserts, "Yesterday, you loved me! How can you just shut down like that?" Quietly, Poussey answers, "I've had a lot of practice." Oh God, this is depressing. Franziska breaks down into sobs at this and runs out of the room, leaving Poussey alone with her sadness. Thank you so much, Orange is the New Black, for these flashbacks of pure pain and trauma.
And flashback! Poussey is standing by the window as Franziska pleads in the background, "Tell your father to fight!" In a defeated tone, Poussey responds, "Won't help. Your father wants us gone, we're gone." Franziska resolves, "Then I'm coming with you." Poussey, laughing: "Don't think Jersey's for you." Franziska: "I love you, Poussey." Turning to face her, Poussey says, "Look, you're fun to fuck, but that's it." She can't even get that sentence out without her voice breaking. When Franziska continues to profess her love for Poussey, she only responds, "You have killer tits. I'll remember those." Oh Poussey, don't do this! In a last ditch attempt to get through to her, Franziska asserts, "Yesterday, you loved me! How can you just shut down like that?" Quietly, Poussey answers, "I've had a lot of practice." Oh God, this is depressing. Franziska breaks down into sobs at this and runs out of the room, leaving Poussey alone with her sadness. Thank you so much, Orange is the New Black, for these flashbacks of pure pain and trauma.
Piper "Super Cool" Chapman
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In present times, Piper is trying to pull together material for her newsletter and she approaches two women, Frieda and Taslitz, to interview them. She starts by asking, "So, since it's Valentine's Day, what is love to you? How would you define love?" Taslitz immediately replies, "That's a retarded fucking question." Pffft...ha ha, yes. Outside of her use of "retarded" (which is awful), her response is perfect. Trying a different tack, Piper asks in a quieter voice, "When was the last time you saw any major plumbing work being done around here?" Ah, here we go. The women provide some useful information for Piper, as she pretends to be asking about fluff under Healy's watchful eyes. She gives Healy a reassuring and ridiculously awkward wink. In the Vauseman battle of winks, Alex Vause is the winner by a landslide. Piper can't even see Alex she's so far behind.